You're frightened of leaving this truly gone fishing amalgam.

Afternoon lows and hos. I am slightly damp, the world decided to rain on my parade today, in more ways than one...

The first and rather more annoying way is my stomach's sudden (well, I say sudden, it hurts all the bloody time, it's just this particular new pain) decision to be very, very angry. Nothing can please him this week. He is dancing in knots and circles and partying with pins and tacks and generally being a right yobo. Seeing Snowdon next week though, where there will hopefully be a more affirmative plan of action about the whole illness malarkey. I had some awful backache on Monday too- right were bone marrow is made- a good sign hopefully? The question is whether the bone marrow being made is Northern or German. It had better be some bloody German, I am definitely down for some form of good event this week, on the big to do list that I imagine god or satan or Insanity Prawn Boy have, whichever one of them is in charge... I don't know, I didn't write the bible. Do they even have the bible on the moon, aliens like? Good lord, how embarassing, we meet the aliens and the first thing they see is the Pope with his silly hat.

It also pissed it down on my way home from fish and chips and gravy. Silly Mother Nature. I ended up with mascara on my ear.

In other news, singledom has fallen upon me once again. Not even massive HRT boobs and a sexy leukaemia blog can keep the man of your dreams by your side girls, take note. Still, that does mean I'm back on the market (I am dating Miss Susie Grumball though, so you'll have to compete with her, a tough act to follow) for any people who have a particularly strong blood disorder fetish.

Constanze. Who until today never knew that cats came in blue.

xXxXxxxXxXx

P.s I have soft rock, not all in life is bad. I have definitely had too much sugar today. That'll teach my stomach to be a gay, he has to digest all this crap. Ahahahahahaha!

P.p.s I thought of another good thing- I was two meters away from being on tv. We all remember when I went on the Find Your Sense of Tumour weekend? Well, they used some footage from that on PRIME TIME TV and one of the shots I was like two meters out of shot. HURRAY for my almost fame!

P.p.p.s I need to stop being such a horrendous optimist, I can see why I've been dumped now. I get on my own bloody wick, god knows what it must be like for all the other poor people around me! Sorry. If you just keep passing me tubes mega rainbow dust I'll shut up. The only thing I love more than waffling rubbish is eating it.

P.p.p.p.s I hope you like the exclusive image of me drinking pomegranate juice that accompanies this post. I do treat you all.