I met a strange lady, she made me nervous.

She took me in and made me breakfast.

This thought just came to me as I was dropping books on my feet trying to carry all my new books to my bedroom (A hundred years of oil- yum yum yum). My weight and eating has been a subject of much distress and posting and sadness and joy over the course of this cancery malarky. However, I am not very good at conveying the quality of my eating at any said time, or something, I'm tired and confused. So, here is the scale of Constanze's eating, where 12 is crap and bad times and 1 is what eating is like in heaven. Yeah, I am totally not so tired that I am unsure where I am.

1= Whole KFC Bucket
2= Huge Chinese Takeaway Designed for at least Three People
3= Two Large KFC Meals
4= Footlong Sub
5= Big Plate of Wagamama Noodles
6= One Large KFC Meal
7= 6 Inch Subway
8= Ginsters
9= Sweet Chilli Splendip
10= One Small KFC Popcorn Chicken
11= One Slice of Ham
12= One Prawn

These are all meals I have had in my epic lifetime. Yes, it's true I once ate a whole KFC bucket to myself, and that it was the highlight of my life. Yesterday I finished a large KFC meal to myself and that puts my at a six, which is halfway to my former glory. A HA HA HA HA, take that cancer cells, you little fuckers, you thought you could beat the mighty Constanze, but now you will feel my secret blend of herbs and spice WRATH!!!! Ok, maybe it's time for bed... NO IT'S NOT...

IT'S OFF TO FINISH MY WATERMELON TIME. Thankyou Jane again, for carrying my delicious melon all that way. Ladies and gents, when you find someone who loves you enough to carry your melon for half an hour, then you've gotta keep them.

Aieee.

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