Built like an Ox? Probably...

Another busy few days have happened folks. Much to my annoyance, my laptop has completely given up the ghost and died, hence I am having to write this in the library and am currently driving everyone insane with my constant tapping. But I have cancer so you can't tell me off, ha ha haaaaaaaaaaaa. I win. Ah, the perks of life threatening illness.

So, I have just begun the stem cell harvesting performance myself. They're taking mine in case the donor's ones don't take, which is incredibly unlikely, but still annoyingly possible... More injecting myself in the stomach, and supposed backache (They gave me more paracetemol that I'm sure is legal... So far, I only feel like I've slept funny or been massaged by an overexcited man...) followed by 4 hours on the funny wheeeee let's have a sieving party with your blood machine. That should all be done by Monday, maybe Tuesday. I am talking to my bones plenty, encouraging them. They aren't very good at getting things right lately (Let's not forget, it's them who're making all the cancer in ther first place!), so this is their chance to shine and make it up to me. Damn bones. Like rebellious teenagers. Well, when they get shot with radiation, that'll teach 'em. Maybe we could try that in teenage detention centres? Tad harsh? Oops, Stalinstanze is out again...

Why does my memory fail every time I sit down to write this? Oh my god I have a friend request on facebook! Oh, it's from a strange Turkish man. Now I feel unpopular. What was I talking about? *reads back* Oh, nothing, that's ok then. OH. BIG NEWS. Young German Male couldn't do the first set of dates, so now I'm going in on the 12th. Hickman line being shoved in on the 6th. Ah, I can't wait to have that, not only is it my only hope of a cool scar, but it's also a new dangly fashion accesory! Doctors are still saying no adding beads. Not even one. Do they not understand the importance of glittery objects in the recovering from cancer process?

And as for my optic nerves, they are now unswollen completely. I looked at the pictures, they must be a 6th of the size they were when I was first admitted... Now I can see allllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll. That includes everything... Through du bedroom vindowwww, ahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaa. Jaaaaaaaaaa. I would not make a good pervert. I have folds at the back of my eyes now though. The only fat rolls on me. Well, just rolls really. I do not have, not have ever had, fat eyes.

I have to repeat the BIG GAY LUNG TESTS. THEY ARE BIG AND GAY. EVEN BIGGER AND EVEN GAYER THAN RICHARD SILLETTTTTTTT. They put horrible things in your mouth and the doctors have accused me of not trying on the last ones but I bloody did and this seems a lot like all the crap they put me through with the MRI because doctors never listen and I AM NOT A DIAGRAM FROM A TEXTBOOK. I would quite like to be though. Like those amazing first aid pictures on the kitchen door on my old corridor at Magdalen. They were SO informative, with their slightly pornograpic, horrendously gormless faces. I wish I had a face like that. Being pretty is annoying. Last time I was in the library, I got wolf whistled. By a chav. In front of my mum. I wish he'd do it now, I gots my walking stick to belt him with... Ah, being disabled is good. You see, my legs may not work, BUT MY ARMS DO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And I parked in a disabled space for the first time yesterday, when I went to buy chickens and kebabs and wedges. I mean, I obviously need to be closer to the door of Morrisons, my sweet chilli wings might get cold by the time I reach the car, and that really is life threatening. For me, anyway.

I should probably text my mum and tell her to get my needles out the fridge. Too lazy. I shall have to suffer slight stinging.

Anyway, must dash. I am a ball of aching and I would rather like to browse this here library's selection of books about Fermi before I hop onto el autobus home...

xXXxXXx

P.s HAPPY BIRTHDAY JANNNEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! Remember kids, I only give bloggy birthday shoutouts to sexy laydeez. You are probably not one.

P.p.s I really like the word Imam, and am annoyed that it doesn't mean something like bread instead of just random religious man.