Worst cancer blogger EVER...

Oh yes, I am. I rule at not blogging... I have my reasons. Like lack of exciting cancery stuff. Just been trekking round the country on my faulty legs visiting friends and bothering Peter Castelliani... Leukaemia is being his usual self, making me rather sleepy but otherwise being quite boring. I had some lung tests and a heart scan, but they were uneventful... Aside from some nurse spending 15 minutes talking to me about how the young people of today can dress way out and ISN'T IT LOVELY. I suppose duck.

Haha, that reminded me of one of the few nice things Rich has ever said to me. Well, it was sort of nice. Not like baking me a cake, WHICH NO ONE HAS EVER DONE. Aside from Kendra for my 15th birthday or something, but that was made of solid icing, and hence there wasn't really any baking at all... Although, it has to be said, I don't really like cake, so I don't know why I'm complaining... Anyway, I was wandering down a street somewhere in central Cheltenham and per usual some men walked pastgorping at me. Rich "It's funny how people stare at you... I mean, you're pretty enough to look at for a second, but then you're so weirdly dressed that they just don't stop looking..." That is complimentary, isn't it? I think it is. I like dressing like a loon.

I am currently choosing a walking stick on ebay. I have fallen in love with a Ukrainian hand carved one, but they cost lots of pennies. And stupid government do not like giving me cancer money. I've still not been paid any money. I am slowly becoming a cancer tramp... Must. Set. Fire. To. Government. Burny burny! Fire! Wooooooooo! I like fire...

Walking sticks are cool. There are so many! Hundreds! I like cancer, it gives me excuses to buy more ridiculous objects... I have found one with a little container for alcohol inside. Me like. OH. I have two more wigs, one is bright red and one is grey... Exciting. Grey hair, feeling tired, bus passes and walking sticks... Glamorous granny alert!!!! Pensioner at 19, ah, the joys of serious illness...

And what joys come next? Aside from the visit of my lovely wench James next weekend, I have some slightly more medically helpful things happening... Don't believe what James says, he is not a doctor. And I just discovered I can make words different colours! RAINBOW BLOG! I am so growed upped. So much so that I eat Weetos for breakfast every day! What was I saying? Oh, illnessy stuff. Yawn. Coming soon to a cancer patient near you- another bone marrow sample, dentists, bothering doctors with forms, blue badges, abdomen images... I am happy about my blue badge. Now you can all drive me around and in return I shall get you good parking spaces and cheap/free parking! Everyone wins!

Oh my, I nearly forgot. THE HAIR. Now then, Constanze is known for her lovely long locks... Well, they are no more! She got bored on Saturday night and hacked them all off. She now has short hair and a fringe. Both things she has never had before, and is slowly slowly becoming accustomed to... Saving so much money on shampoo. Not to mention time on brushing. I thought it would upset me at least a bit, but I just hacked it off like I was shaving me legs... Hair grows back, as all the cancery peoples say... I can spend a month or two looking like Black Francis... Win? My mum said I should go to the hairdressers, but why? Talk about bad value for money, I mean, I'll be bald in 6 weeks! Baaald. Like a goth vulture. And I scrounge food and stuff, so that's probably more of an accurate description than I would like... Oh dear.

I went to Perch's house! Now that was fun. Perch's face is definitely the cure for cancer... That's why I carry those pictures of him around whereever I go...

I have also been getting a lot of birthday presents this week... Only two weeks late! Nah, I don't mind, it spreads out the fun. And we all know I'm too exciteable to begin with! Stamps and sweets and bags and more stamps and STAMPS and stickers and all the fun things! And all of those at once would have caused my brain to explode... A bit like at Rich's house where he let me listen to three Rocky Horror songs one after another and I didn't stop shaking for half an hour...

So, to conclude, cancer is being very boring. But Constanze? She is being very interesting indeed...

P.s Photo is of new short haired Constanze in the horrible snobby town of Wincester, also home to some posh boys... Long story...